Tag: rejection

Recognizing and Avoiding the Slow No.

You should always be aware of the slow no.

It’s the worst of the nos.

Worse than infernos, volcanoes and no-it-alls.

The slow no is the decision that is always going to be no. No matter how much support there is for a yes.

Decision makers will let you explore, research, propose, pile up work towards, and spend a lot of time diddling on things that are always going to finish with a no.

It’s a waste of time, energy, enthusiasm and hope. Like that romantic interest that you know is way out of your league, but they are really nice to you, and you start thinking there is a chance, when there is really no chance there is a chance.

What’s the best way to deal with the slow no?

Cut to the chase.

Ask if this is likely to end in a slow no.

Ask the decision-makers, if all the evidence seems to support a yes, will it still be a no because of politics, budget, bias, distance, favored-competitors, or other factors out of your control.

The slow no is likely to occur when:

  • You wonder why the decision maker hasn’t made a decision like this before
  • The cost seems out of line with the budget
  • It all seems too good to be true (like the whole Lance Armstrong thing)
  • The action would be out of character for the decision maker
  • You smell political factors or nepotism at play
  • They say you are facing 1 in a million odds, and you think they are saying there’s a chance
  • The decision maker puts the word pro in procrastination

The best thing you can do is hit fast forward and turn that slow no into a fast no. Or a know-now no.

You can also openly rescind your proposal or request.

When your change of heart is met with a shrug, you know it was a slow no.

That puts time back into your account. So you can use it more productively on something else. Or someone else.

Key Takeaway

Don’t lose time on a slow no. Sniff them out. Fast forward them to the final answer. And use your time on something more valuable.

*If you know someone who could benefit from this message, please share it with them.

+For more of the best life lessons I have learned check out my book, What Does Your Fortune Cookie Say? from Ripples Media.

How to convert negative energy into positive results.

Dams take the potential power in water, focus it, harness it and use it to create electricity. We call it renewable energy, because the planet will always create more water. Wind turbines do the same thing. And because the Earth will continue to create more wind, there will always be more to harness. Plus, everyone knows it’s windy.

As humans, we can do the same thing. There are powerful forces on this planet that will never run dry. Forces like stress, rejection, failure, anger, teasing, bullying, disappointment and loneliness. And of course all the isms. Racism, sexism, fascism and the unappreciated euphemism. Instead of letting them wear and weaken you, harness their power. Like a turbine in a dam.

You can use negative fuel sources to fuel your positive response. These fuels can drive your most productive and meaningful actions. They can push you further, faster and longer. Like that stuff Lance Armstrong once swore he wasn’t using. #LiarLiarLycraOnFire  Use the negative energy to create endurance, passion, and commitment. When you think of slowing, suspending or stopping, the negative fuel will keep you keeping on.

When you develop the ability to harness and focus negative energy, every time bad things happen, good things follow. One step back is followed by many steps forward. Disappointment becomes drive. Rejection becomes response. Stress feeds success. Anger amplifies action.

The most successful people aren’t immune to negative forces. They use those forces to propel them forward. In many cases, the most enviable people have dealt with the most unenviable adversity. They have simply set their course and let the power that so many try to avoid fill their sails, and drive them towards their goals.

Key Takeaway

The world will provide you with an endless supply of negative energy. But you can transform it into an excellent source of energy for good. Harness it. Focus it. And it will power the most positive actions in your life.

*If you know someone who could benefit from this message, please share it with them.