Month: October 2023

4 Halloween tricks to success that can benefit you every day.

It’s Halloween! Today is one of the most interesting days of the year. If aliens landed on Earth today they would have a very different impression of the place than if they landed on, say, Saint Patrick’s Day. (Note: Earthlings are all green and smell like cabbage and alcohol.)

But hidden under the clown masks and Freddy Kreuger costumes are important life lessons. As you go about your day today note these 4 tricks to success from Halloween that can benefit you any day.

Dress the part.

If you don’t wear a costume you are not likely to get candy. Remember that when you go on a job interview, a new business pitch, or a date. Portraying the right image is important. Perception is reality. At The Weaponry our dress code is simple: Dress the way you want people to see you. Also, today, make sure to really wear clothes. Halloween shouldn’t be an excuse to walk around in your underwear. (That last point is really just a note to self. You do you.)

Ask for what you want.

On Halloween, people walk up to total strangers, ask for a treat, and get it. It’s a great reminder to ask for what you want. Often it’s just that easy. Here’s more proof.

Things look scarier than they really are.

Those ghosts, goblins, and Tammy Faye Bakkers you see at Halloween may look scary on the surface. But peak a little closer and you realize that they only look scary. It’s really just the kid down the street. Or Sally from accounting. Many of the most intimidating things in life are not that scary once you actually confront them. I discovered this about entrepreneurship, writing a book, buying my own health insurance, and raising teenagers.

The more doors you knock on the more doors will open for you.

When a kid comes home with a pillowcase loaded with candy you know that they went to a lot of houses. Because the more doors you knock on the more doors open. And the more doors that open the more John Candy you get. It is true at Halloween. And it is true in sales, job hunting, fundraising, dating, and advertising. Knocking on doors creates opportunity. And opportunity turns into success.

Key Takeaway

Happy Halloween! To be successful today, remember to dress the part. Know that things look scarier than they really are. Ask for what you want. And the more doors you knock on the more doors will open for you. Also, check your candy before you eat it. And if you have any extra Reece’s Peanut Butter Cups, send them my way.

*If you know someone who could benefit from this message, please share it with them.

+For more of the best life lessons I have learned check out my book, What Does Your Fortune Cookie Say? from Ripples Media.

I was given $200 I could spend on anything. Here’s what I bought with it.

Three years ago $200 fell out of the sky and into my hand. No, it wasn’t 20,000 pennies from Heaven. That would have been cool. But life-threatening.

Gusto, the online payroll processing vendor that The Weaponry uses to pay our people, ran a referral promotion that allowed us to share our referral code with others. If someone we referred signed up for Gusto we would both get a $200 gift card. And when my friend Theresa Pride, owner of Pride Physique Pilates and Physical Therapy in Atlanta ran her first payroll we both received our Amazon gift cards.

This created a fun opportunity. Because Amazon sells almost every product under the sun. (Or under the moon if you shop at night.) So I could buy practically any product on the planet that costs $200 or less. I felt like I was at Chuck E Cheese’s and got to choose anything on the prize wall valued at $200 or less. It was a little kid’s dream come true for this big kid.

What Will I Do?

As I pondered my opportunity my mind returned to my favorite childhood book, Farmer Boy by Laura Ingalls Wilder. I have read that book more times than any other book.

One of my favorite stories in the book recounts a time when Almanzo Wilder was at his town’s 4th of July celebration and his cousin dared him to ask his Dad for a nickel to buy a lemonade. Nervously, Almanzo asks his father for the nickel. After a long thoughtful moment, Almanzo’s Pa pulls a 50-cent piece out of his pocket (not out of Da Club) and reminds Almanzo about all of the hard farm work that goes into earning 50 cents. He hands Almanzo the coin and tells him he can buy the lemonade, drink it up and it will be gone. Or he can use the money to buy a suckling pig, raise it up, and sell it at a significant profit. You know, farm stuff.

Almanzo quickly recognized the opportunity to turn his 50 cents into far more value by investing it, rather than spending it. He bought the pig.

150 years later Almanzo inspired me to do the same thing. Only not with a pig.

Investing vs Spending

I could have used the $200 Amazon gift card to buy practically anything. But I chose to invest it in books for my library.

I invested the money in my own education. And I learned far more than $200 worth.

I learned lessons that make me better at my job. I learned lessons that make me a better person. I bought books that inspire me to do more, to recognize opportunity, and to think bigger.

Here are the books that I bought and added to my library and to my personal knowledge:

Grit by Angela Duckworth

Never Split The Difference By Chris Voss

The 4 Disciplines of Execution by Chris ‘Don’t Call Me McKenny’ McChesney

The Richest Man in Babylon by George Clason

Principles by Ray Dalio  (This is not about people who lead schools)

Start With Why by Simon Sinek  (I heard this inspired The Carpenters to write the lyrics to Close To You)

Pitch Anything by Oren Klaff

Estimating Rehab Costs by J Scott. (This is about rehabbing properties, not going to rehab.)

So Good They Can’t Ignore You by Cal Newport

Cashflow Quadrant by Robert Kiyosaki

The Book on Rental Property Investing by Brandon Turner

The Innovators Dilemma by Clayton Christensen

The Magic of Thinking Big by David Schwartz

Call Me Ted by Ted Turner

While I spent $200 on these books, I couldn’t possibly calculate all the value I have received in return. I highly recommend all of these books.

Key Takeaway:

Remember not to just spend on yourself. Invest in yourself. Invest in your education, your skills, and your motivation. I hope you get to experience a fun and revealing test like this. And I hope you put thought into it, so you get a great deal out of it like I did.

*If you know someone who could benefit from this message, please share it with them.

+For more of the best life lessons I have learned check out my book, What Does Your Fortune Cookie Say? from Ripples Media.

The best way to be successful is to find and focus on this one thing.

You have a valuable talent. Everyone does. You probably have more than one. But just being born with a valuable talent doesn’t make it valuable. Sorry, Charlie.

To unlock the value of your natural talent you need to do 3 things:

  1. You have to recognize what your valuable talent is.
  2. You have to develop that talent.
  3. You must find opportunities to put your talent to work where it creates value.

Valuable talents could be anything. Here is a non-exhaustive list to get your introspector introspecting.

  • Listening
  • Organizing
  • Remembering
  • Strategizing
  • Pruf Reeding
  • Creativity
  • Drawing Attention
  • Details
  • Humor
  • Caring
  • Impersonating Arron Neville.
  • Managing
  • Sales
  • Art
  • Picking Locks
  • Throwing Parties
  • Music
  • Teaching
  • Making Long Lists Less Boring To Read
  • Math
  • Words
  • Energy
  • Vision
  • Mechanics
  • Relationships
  • Looking good (This talent pairs well with all others)
  • Discovering talent in others

Key Takeaway

Don’t waste time trying to strengthen your weaknesses. That doesn’t unlock the kind of value that will make you highly successful. Instead, focus on your talents. Discover them. Develop them. Put yourself in situations where you can use them every day.

*If you know someone who could benefit from this message, please share it with them.

+For more of the best life lessons I have learned check out my book, What Does Your Fortune Cookie Say? from Ripples Media.

A simple rule of thumb to get the most out of your people.

When I was a kid I loved the movie Smokey and The Bandit. I was into trucks and Trans Ams. So a movie about those two vehicles racing across America, starring Burt Reynolds and his mustache, was an obvious Oscar winner to me.

I also loved the theme song from the movie, East Bound and Down by Jerry Reed. My favorite line from the song is the classic, ‘We’ve got a long way to go, and a short time to get there.’

Those lyrics still play in my head today. Because as a business owner, and both a football and track and field coach, I have big goals for my teams to accomplish. And I have a short time to make them happen.

Getting The Most Out Of Your People

To get the most out of your people there is a simple exercise to help you budget the time and energy you spend with each of the members of your team.

Grab a sheet of paper. (Yes, they still make paper.) On the left side write down a list of those you manage or coach in order from most productive to least productive. Your productivity rock stars will be at the top. Your ‘Why-are-they-still-here’ person is at the bottom.

Then, to the right of that, create a list, in order, of how much time you spend managing or coaching each of the people you lead.

Now, you are going to draw a good old-fashioned straight line connecting the names on the left list to the same name on the right list.

If you are drawing straight lines, and the lines don’t cross, you are budgeting your time appropriately. If your lines Christopher Cross, you spend too little time with your most talented people, and too much time with your least talented people. It is time to re-budget.

Key Takeaway

Maximize the return on your time invested in your team. This means the most productive people should get the most time and attention. The least productive people should get the least of your time. This rewards good behavior from your best people. And it ensures that your time and energy are invested where they will get the greatest return. Spending more time with your less productive team members sends the wrong signal to your great talent. And it is a waste of time. With rare exceptions, the least productive team members will always generate the least results.

*If you know someone who could benefit from this message, please share it with them.

+For more of the best life lessons I have learned check out my book, What Does Your Fortune Cookie Say? from Ripples Media.

Why I am excited about work and life this week.

I am having a great day. Scratch that. I am having a great week. I am shooting a new commercial this week in Los Angeles. All of the leaves are not brown. And the sky is not gray. This is just the beginning of an amazing filming adventure that will cover 5 states in all 4 US time zones. (The United States has 4 different time zones if you ignore Hawaii Time, Alaska Time, and Hammer Time.)

Some other fun updates from this week:

Let’s do this!!!

Key Takeaway

Great effort, great reading, and great relationships compound. Keep putting in the work. Force good things to life through your actions. Be of value to others. It’s the most valuable thing you can do for yourself, your career, and your happiness.

*If you know someone who could benefit from this message, please share it with them.

+For more of the best life lessons I have learned check out my book, What Does Your Fortune Cookie Say? from Ripples Media.

How to use the power of regret to live your best life today.

Imagine for a moment you got the news that you have one day to live. Just one. And it’s not Groundhog Day in Punxsutawney. (Nice try though.) You have enough time to say goodbye to your closest friends and family. But not enough time to add to your life resume in any meaningful way. I know this is a bummer. It’s supposed to be.

Now, take a moment to reflect.

What do you regret not doing during your time on the planet?

  • Travel?
  • Starting a business?
  • Writing your book?
  • The relationship you left unrelated?
  • Being scared?
  • Not giving back?
  • Not being your true self?
  • Too little time with loved ones?
  • That person you murdered?
  • Not buying life insurance?

The good news is, as far as I know, you have more than one day left.

The even better news is that you now know what to do with your time left. Do those things you would regret not doing now. Or stop doing the things you would regret not stopping now. That way, when you get to the real end of your story you will have more ‘I dids!’ and fewer ‘I wish I hads.’

The Proof

I gave myself this Regret Test on the eve of my 40th birthday. The regrets that surfaced inspired me to start my own business (The Weaponry), write a book (What Does Your Fortune Cookie Say?), travel more internationally, coach my kids’ sports teams, take redeye flights home from work trips to maximize time with my family and donate blood. The Regret Test offered the most important question I have ever asked myself. I encourage you to do the same.

Key Takeaway

Regret is a powerful tool. It helps you recognize the relative value of alternative outcomes. Tap into the power of regret to inspire your next actions. And start doing the things you wish you had done now, before it is too late.

*If you know someone who could benefit from this message, please share it with them.

+For more of the best life lessons I have learned check out my book, What Does Your Fortune Cookie Say? from Ripples Media.

The key to your personal happiness and the one thing that will prevent it.

One of the greatest studies ever conducted on humans is the Grant Study, also known as the Harvard Human Happiness Study. It has tracked the same people for 85 years. And it has developed a clear conclusion that the greatest influence on human happiness and fulfillment is strong personal relationships. Having close, meaningful relationships with your friends and family will make you happier and healthier, and help you live longer. Which helps explain why Keith Richards and Willie Nelson are still kicking.

But what if the relationship has sailed?

Yet strong and deep personal relationships take work to maintain. You undoubtedly have good friends or family members that you were once close to, but now it has been a long time since you talked. Maybe there was an issue. Or a move. Or you no longer work together. Because many of our strongest friendships develop at work. Which is where I met my wife. And a bunch of other great friends that I didn’t marry.

Yet studies clearly show that resuming and restrengthening your relationships will have a positive impact on your health and happiness.

Hello…

Interestingly, studies also show that the number one reason people don’t reach out to friends, family and former coworkers after long silences is that they worry that reaching out will be awkward.

Which means that worrying about the awkwardness of a conversation with a once close friend or family member is one of the greatest barriers to human happiness.

Really? Awkwardness? (Said the way Allen Iverson said ‘Practice?‘) That’s crazy. And we’re not even talking about real awkwardness. Just the perceived potential of awkwardness.

In reality, most people are thrilled to hear from a friend or family member they haven’t heard from in a long time. Which means that by reaching out you are doing yourself and the person you are reaching out to a solid. Because reconnected and reestablishing meaningful relationships is not only highly enjoyable, it is extremely good for your health and happiness. Which makes you feel like Pharrell Williams in a room without a roof.

Key Takeaway

Strong personal relationships are the key to happiness, health, and longevity. Invest time and energy in your current relationships. Reconnect with friends and family members you have not been in touch with lately. Get over the awkwardness. It will be worth it.

*If you know someone who could benefit from this message, please share it with them.

+For more of the best life lessons I have learned check out my book, What Does Your Fortune Cookie Say? from Ripples Media.

The 5 little words of encouragement I tell myself when things get rough.

Life isn’t easy. It never has been. In fact, things go wrong all the time. And when you are trying to do hard things personally or professionally you will experience bumps, twists, stops, and restarts. It can be maddening. But so is quitting.

When things get hard and the ride gets rough, I always tell myself these 5 simple words:

Just stay on the horse.

Like you, most of the challenges I face don’t involve riding an actual horse.

But many of the difficult things we encounter feel like a bucking horse trying to throw us to the ground.

Things like work issues, relationship challenges, parenting, adversaries, unexpected expenses, illness, and weather. (Did I mention parenting?)

Remember, problems and challenges will keep coming. But they will also go away. You just have to make sure you stay on the horse long enough to enjoy watching the challenges go away.

So don’t quit, Buckaroo. And don’t give up. Tame the challenge. And enjoy the smooth ride on the other side.

Key Takeaway

Just stay on the horse. The bumps are part of the adventure. They make the ride more difficult. But they make the success sweeter. They make the story better. And ultimately, they make you better too.

*If you know someone who could benefit from this message, please share it with them.

+For more of the best life lessons I have learned check out my book, What Does Your Fortune Cookie Say? from Ripples Media.

The great life lesson you can learn from these two stars.

Recently I did my best Alice In Wonderland impression and fell down an internet rabbit hole or two. First I looked up information on NBA star, Damian Lillard, the newest member of the Milwaukee Bucks. Then I looked up info on Travis Kelce, the tight end for the Kansas City Chiefs. Kelce has received a lot of attention lately for his relationship with Taylor Swift. There must be a lot of pressure dating Taylor Swift. Because you know going into it that if you break up there be a song about you. And you also know that you are never, ever getting back together. Like, ever.

Are you ready for this, Travis?

Kelce and Lillard have a lot in common, besides unusual last names. They are both amongst the very best ever to do what they do.

Lillard is a 7-time NBA All-Star. Kelce is an 8-time Pro Bowler. (Those 2 designations are equivalent in their sports. Because in basketball you star, and in football you bowl.)

They both make a shipload of money. Lillard will make $45 million dollars this season. Kelce will make $14 million dollars. (Note: The NBA plays 82 games per season and the NFL plays 17. Which means Kelce is actually paid more on a per-game basis. However, he is also more likely to spend retirement sitting in a dark room struggling to remember his catchphrase. So let’s call it a wash.)

Two Stars

But the other thing they have in common may surprise you. Coming out of high school they were both considered 2-Star athletes.

Damian Lillard proves that even if you are a 2-Star high school athlete you can still make $45 million a year and get to live in Milwaukee.

This means that the experts who evaluate potential college talent rated them both as 2-star prospects in high school. That’s not on a 2-point scale but on a 5-point scale. Said another way, there were 3 tiers of athletes considered better than them.

Yet, here they are. Both make millions of dollars playing their sport at the highest level and are considered amongst the very best at what they do. They make headlines. They date superstars. And perhaps more noteworthy, they are causing dudes like me to check out their Wikipedia pages on their lunch break.

Key Takeaway

Don’t believe the lack of hype. Believe in yourself and your abilities and skills. Believe in your self-improvement journey and potential. Believe that your mind is your most powerful weapon. Your mind determines what you are really capable of. It is not where you start that matters. It is the work you are willing to put in to get to where you want to go. Your will is the great equalizer. Until it is the great surpasser.

*If you know someone who could benefit from this message, please share it with them.

+For more of the best life lessons I have learned check out my book, What Does Your Fortune Cookie Say? from Ripples Media.

How to respond to your imperfections like a manufacturing facility does.

I am trying to get better all the time. But the reality is that I am not always better.

I’m building good habits. But I still have bad habits too.

I try to be patient and kind. But I still get angry, lose my temper, and say naughty words.

I try to be a doer. But too often I procrastinate. (Although sometimes I don’t procrastinate until later.)

I try not to let my phone take attention away from my family and friends. But then I’ll find something hilarious on social media, or wonder about the Wordle word, or get a notification about the famous person from the 80s who got eaten by a snake, and just have to click on it to find out if it was David Coverdale.

Why? Why?

Tell em that it’s human nature.

But I keep trying.

And I don’t let my lesser actions and behaviors define me. Or confirm that I am not actually getting better. I know I am.

Instead, I always think about those signs you see in a factory that count the number of days they have gone without a workplace injury. They are reminders of your accumulated success. And encouragement to keep the streak alive. And presumably the people too.

So I have counters in my head, on my phone, and on pieces of paper around my house tallying my successful days doing or not doing various things. The streaks feel good. So I focus on extending them and not breaking the chain. But when I do, I reset the clock, start again, and try to go longer, if not forever.

Key Takeaway

Self-improvement is directional. It is not about absolutes. Increase the number of days and times you do the right things the way you want to do them in your head. Do the good things more. Do the bad things less. Focus on building your streaks. A winning streak is an uninterrupted sequence of successes. That should always be your goal. Just keep adding days. Go as long as you can without messing up. The goal is to be better for the rest of your life. But if you break the chain, always start a new chain and try again.

*If you know someone who could benefit from this message, please share it with them.

+For more of the best life lessons I have learned check out my book, What Does Your Fortune Cookie Say? from Ripples Media.