Tag: winning

The Power Of Enthusiasm And Teamwork.

Last week I had a fun and unique opportunity. Some of the coaches and parents of my son Magnus’s freshman football team asked me if I would come speak to the team at their Wednesday night team dinner before their final game of the season on Thursday. I jumped at the chance, nearly pulling a hamstring in the process.

The team had a frustrating season and hadn’t lived up to their own expectations. Despite good coaching and plenty of talent, they were going into their 8th game with a 2-4-1 record. They were just 5 points away from being 4-3. Which is like the difference between being cute and having a nice personality.

So on Wednesday night, I talked to them about two things that could have a major impact on their final game.

First, I talked about the energy and enthusiasm they brought to the field. The psychological force you bring to the game offers a major advantage. I noticed that they weren’t bringing their full allotment of energetic horsepower to their games, and that hurt their play. (It was like their 10-gallon hat was feeling 10-gallons flat, and they hankered for a hunk of cheese.)

Then I talked about the importance of playing as a team. Even when you make mistakes, and everyone makes mistakes, you have to support each other and move forward. You have to include everyone in the team huddle, treat each other like a band of brothers, because you are stronger when you play together. Otherwise, you’ll all end up living in a van down by the river.

I also shared that when I played football and the other team started pointing fingers and fighting with each other, we knew we had won. Because when teammates fight each other, they beat themselves.

To add color, I told the team that my freshman football teammates were still many of my closest friends. We stood up in each other’s weddings. We helped each other start businesses. And even though we are scattered from New England to California, we still have a group chat, do team Zoom calls, and get together back home every few years. And we have more inside jokes than most people have outside jokes.

This group of 14 and 15-year-old boys listened intently as I encouraged them to bring their best energy and enthusiasm to the field on Thursday. They paid attention as I urged them to end the season on a high note, with the right trajectory going into the offseason, their next sports, and the next football season. I encouraged them to play like a team, feed off each other’s energy, and good things would happen.

So what happened?

From the moment the boys took the field, I could see the difference in their attitude, energy and team dynamics. They were fired up, they were connecting with each other, and ready to bring the heat. (And maybe da noize, and da funk.)

And they did.

On the opening drive, the Homestead Highlanders’ freshman team was hitting on all 11 cylinders. The boys marched down the field with attitude and scored a touchdown and a 2-point conversion to go up 8-0.

On their following defensive series, they bent, but they didn’t break. They played united as a team. Then, cornerback Markey Walker intercepted the opponent’s pass at the 3-yard line. With a key block from my son Magnus and an escort of teammates, Markey returned the interception 97 yards for a touchdown. Boom!

That play fanned the flames of their team spirit. (Not Teen Spirit.) And they just kept rolling. The score at halftime was 20-0.

They came out sharp and aggressive in the second half. Like aged Wisconsin cheddar. In fact, when the opponent fumbled the opening kickoff, our boys jumped on it. A minute later, we punched the ball in for another touchdown.

At that point, the opponent began fighting with themselves and blaming each other. And our boys knew they had won.

Our team scored again. Everyone got significant playing time. The sideline was spirited and the play on the field was inspired. The camaraderie was palpable. And the boys were a force to be reckoned with. The coaches were pumped up. The parents were proud. And when the final whistle blew, the scoreboard accurately summarized the story of the game with the final score of 33-8.

After shaking hands with the opponent, a fired-up group of young men rushed to gather in the endzone, as a team, one last time. The team energy was palpable. The pride and togetherness hung like a halo over the huddled players and their coaches. It was the perfect ending to an imperfect season. A great step in the right direction. And proof of what happens when you play together, with energy.

I am thankful for the opportunity to talk to the boys the night before their last game. I was extremely proud of the way they took full ownership of their mental approach to the game. And I am delighted to see this group finish on such a high note. I hope that over the course of their high school careers they create deep and lasting relationships with each other that last a lifetime. Like the relationships I have with my high school football teammates. And I hope that they learn the most important lesson of all. And that is that the same things that make you successful in sports, make you successful in life. Which is why youth sports are so important.

*If you know someone who could benefit from this message, please share it with them.

+For more of the best life lessons I have learned, check out my book, What Does Your Fortune Cookie Say? from Ripples Media. And consider subscribing to Adam’s Good Newsletter.

6 Key lessons from the biggest days of my career.

I have been thinking a lot about my Pivotal Days lately. Last week I shared a post about the importance of knowing your Pivotal Days. These are the days that have the biggest impact on your career and your life. They are the days that alter your path and your trajectory. And perhaps your tax bracket, zip code and Wikipedia page. 

The reason it is so important to know your Pivotal Days is that they help you develop wisdom. Wisdom does not come from experience. It comes from reflecting on your experience. When you analyze your past you learn and grow. By reflecting on your most positively impactful days you learn how to create more of them. Because success leaves clues. Just like bad criminals. #BlackLeatherGlove

Reflecting on my Pivotal Days has taught me the following:

  1. Take action. My advertising career started when I literally got off the couch and made a phone call. I stopped overthinking and procrastinating. I dialed 10 numbers. And my life changed. Boom.
  2. Ask For What You Want. It’s a very simple premise. But it opens more doors than you can imagine. (Unless you have a really good imagination, in which case it opens all those doors that you can accurately imagine.)
  3. Prepare for your opportunities. Not all of the magic happens on the Pivotal Days. Preparation fuels dreams. In many cases, you have to do the hard work ahead of time. So when the opportunity arises on those big days, you are ready to shine bright like a diamond.
  4. Take Risks. Sometimes the gold is on the other side of the gap, and you have to risk the leap to get it. This happens when you take a new job, become an entrepreneur, make an investment, write a book or ask that special someone for a date. Especially when that special someone is a co-worker and it would be super awkward if it didn’t work out. (But it did work out.)
  5. Bet On Yourself. You have to believe that you are the pivot point. You are the secret ingredient. That you have the superpower. That you have the invisible key to unlock success. When you believe that you are the difference maker you should go all in on your abilities. There is no safer bet in the world than to bet on yourself. Because you can stack the deck in your favor through your hard work, determination and resiliency.
  6. Enthusiasm Matters. There have been several pivotal moments in my life and my career when my enthusiasm got others excited. They bought into a vision because I was so bought in. They believed that I had both the right vision and the energy to make the vision come true. Be that person. Energy is contagious. Like yawns. And giggles in church.

Key Takeaway

Know your pivotal days. Reflect on them. Understand what contributed to them. Because when you understand the causes of your pivotal days you can create more of them.

*If you know someone who could benefit from this message, please share it with them.

+For more of the best life lessons I have learned check out my book, What Does Your Fortune Cookie Say? from Ripples Media.

All successful results are a product of these 2 simple factors.

I have competed all my life. As an athlete. As a businessman. And as a coach. I have seen how some teams and businesses always generate great results, while others never do. (Coughing: Cleveland Browns.)

I have learned what it takes to achieve great results. And like Bennifer, Hall & Oates, and Gin n’ Juice, successful results are a product of two things.

The System and The Subject.

The System is the way of doing things.

It is the process. The expectations. The values. The technique. It is the school of thought. The philosophies. It is the declared purpose and priorities. It is the tolerances permitted. It is the culture. It is the rituals and norms. And the people with other names besides Norm.

The Subject is the person being coached, led or taught.

Subjects vary in skills, talent, commitment, attitude, experience, determination, resolve and grit. They vary in natural ability and capacity. They vary in tolerance for pain and suffering. They vary in height, weight and speed. And subjects vary in loyalty, royalty, and the price they are willing to pay.

What This Means.

The system will determine how much you can get out of the subject.

The subject will determine how much you can get out of the system.

A better system will generate better results for a subject.

A better subject will generate better results within a system.

Key Takeaway

For the team to create the greatest results, continuously improve your system, and attract better subjects. For the individual to achieve the greatest results, find the greatest system.

*If you know someone who could benefit from this message, please share it with them.

+For more of the best life lessons I have learned check out my book, What Does Your Fortune Cookie Say? from Ripples Media.

How Our Team Won An Impossibly Close Championship.

I have loved track and field since I first joined my high school track team as a freshman. I loved it when I was no good. I loved it when I set a state record. And I loved the whole self-improvement journey in between. (Other than the times that I threw up. Which was a lot.)

While track and field is thought of as an individual sport, some of my favorite memories were winning conference team championships, both in the Connecticut Valley Conference as a Hanover High School Marauder and in the Big Ten Conference, as a University of Wisconsin Badger. There is something about being part of a great team win that makes you feel like part of a gang. A very fit gang with good nutritional habits.

Today, my day job is running the advertising and ideas agency The Weaponry. But in the spring, my later afternoon job is coaching athletes to throw the discus and put the shot on the girl’s track team at Homestead High School in Mequon, Wisconsin.

Conference Championships

On Tuesday afternoon we had our North Shore Conference Championship meet. Our conference is loaded with 10 great schools with top-tier talent and excellent coaches. (I note that because it is true and because some of them also read this blog.)

We knew the meet would be close, but just how close we never would have imagined.

The Homestead girl’s team is deep and talented. But so are our competitors. And despite our high hopes and the fact that we have won the team championship the past 2 years, we stumbled right out of the blocks. #UhOh

We had a talented runner, Sophia LaGalbo, hit a hurdle and take a nasty fall. We had an athlete we expected to score in several events, Korynne Moga, get hurt in her first event and have to drop out of the competition. We got disqualified in an early relay for passing the baton outside the zone. And we had other girls enter the competition ranked high in their event and wind up just outside of the top 8 places that score points. #gulp

As the defending conference champions this was all very disappointing. Especially as we watched other teams rack up great performances and the well-deserved points that go with them.

But despite the poor luck and poor performances, the Homestead Highlanders kept going. And we kept collecting points. Senior Savannah Fraley won the 800-meter dash like a rock star. And Eva Brandenburg dominated the 300-meter hurdle race. Plus Sophia LaGalbo, road rash and all, finished 7th in the 300 hurdles to add 2 more points.

Too Little. Too Late?

It was getting late in the meet and we were still well behind. But we had some late events with great potential to add points to the team total. In the 200-meter dash, Brandenburg took 3rd and Natalie Mueller took 8th to add 9 more points. Which was great. But that was followed by the 3200-meter run, where we had no entries, which was bad. Then came the discus results. One of the events I coach. And I was a very proud Coach-Dad when my athlete-daughter Ava took 1st place by 7 feet. And Senior Mariah Reynolds took 5th. This meant we added 14 points to the team total, which was great.

The Final 2

The meet came down to the final 2 events. The triple jump and the 4×400 meter relay.

We have a strong 4 x 400 relay. And we started strong with Grace Zortman finishing the first leg in first place. Then Shaylin Swenson ran an equally strong 2nd leg to lengthen our lead. Natalie Mueller added a great 3rd leg to maintain the lead. Which meant the race all came down to first-year track athlete Charlotte Lueck, a smiley and talented sophomore, and her 4th and final leg.

Charlotte, who is one of my favorite athletes on the team, came around the first 100 meters strong and steady. But a strong runner from Grafton High School charged hard and was right behind Charlotte by the time they reached the backstretch. But Charlotte kept her cool, and at 200 meters the challenger had dropped back several meters. The Homestead home crowd was going crazy. But on the final 100 meters, the race tightened up again, getting closer and closer as they approached the finish line.

But Charlotte held the lead and ran a very fast lap against very tough competition. Like all-you-can-eat-steak-buffet tough. With the victory, we added 10 more points to our total. Which meant that the conference championship all came down to the triple jump to determine if Homestead or Slinger High School would be conference champs.

One…Two…

Our team is great at the triple jump. Standout athlete Anisa Barnett won the event. And Sheba Bentum-Mensah grabbed 8th to help us rack up 11 more points. However, the Slinger Owls are also great at the triple jump. And they placed 2nd and 6th, to also scored 11 points. OMG!

The Final Tally

In sports, there are close competitions. And then there are really, really, really close competitions. In football, basketball and baseball you can win by as little as one point. And our track team would have been thrilled to have just one more point than our competitors. But we fell short.

However, in track and field, because of ties within the field events, (typically in the pole vault and the high jump, where competitors can finish at the same height) you can be awarded half points. And when the final total was tallied our team had won the North Shore Conference Championship by 1/2 of a point. A freaking half-point!

This meant that if any of our scorers had finished just one place lower we would not have won. It was the truest possible team victory. Every performance matters. There was no literally no breathing room. No room for error. But we won. And winning by 1/2 point is as good as winning by a mile. Maybe better.

There are 3 great things about team championships:

  1. Your teammates are there to help you out when you stumble, fall or pull a hamstring.
  2. Celebrating a victory together is far greater than celebrating alone.
  3. The win creates a team bond that lasts forever. And at the end of the day, the relationships and team memories are what you will remember and value most.

Key Takeaways

  1. Sometimes bad things happen. Keep going.
  2. Get up when you fall.
  3. Never give up.
  4. Work hard.
  5. Run your race.
  6. Lean on your teammates. You’ll go farther together.
  7. Finish Strong.
  8. It’s not over until it’s over.
  9. Sometimes 1/2 point is all it takes.
I am very proud to coach and win 3 conference team championships in a row with this crew of Laura Bosley, Jay Fuller, Me VonMe, John Krueger and Heather Krueger.

Congratulations to the following girls on their hard-fought team championship!

  • Ava Albrecht
  • Anisa Barnett
  • Scout Bonkoski
  • Eva Brandenburg
  • Savannah Fraley
  • Sierra Gill
  • Alexandra Gaskin
  • Korynne Moga
  • Natalie Mueller
  • Kyah McCray
  • Savannah Fraley
  • Shaylin Swenson
  • Charlotte Lueck
  • Sophia LaGalbo
  • Julia Gaskin
  • Sheba Bentum-Mensah
  • Mariah Reynolds
  • Emma Rader
  • Grace Zortman
  • Leila Lu Maye
  • Annika Johnson
  • Grace Zortman
  • Kelsey Hart
  • Caroline Garsha
  • Addie Kane
  • Amelia Horwitz
  • Ava Lamb

*If I missed anyone I am sorry. If I duplicated any names you are welcome. The search engines will find you first.


There is more than one way to win.

Yesterday I coached my son Magnus’ 6th-grade football team against a really strong opponent. I am the defensive coordinator. Which means that I spent many hours this week preparing for the game.

Here’s a breakdown of my efforts:

  1. I watched game film of our win last week. Then I went all John Madden, and telestrated the game film on Hudl to show our team things they did really well. And things they need to improve. There was plenty of both.
  2. I watched game film of our upcoming opponent to understand their offense. I documented every play and every formation they ran in their past 2 games. Then I strategized a game plan to defend them. I even considered cutting off the sleeves of my hoodie to help me channel my inner Bill Belichick.
  3. I created our 3 different defensive lineups (Black, Red and White) that would ensure everyone on the team got to play defense.
  4. I worked with my fellow coaches Josh Hunt, Jon Eippert, Paul Lillyroot, Scott Steger and Ryan Smith at practice for 2 hours on Monday, Wednesday and Friday to prepare our boys for the Saturday game.

I was confident that we had a great game plan and that our team was talented enough to win the game.

But we got beaten badly.

35-0.

I was frustrated and disappointed with the outcome. But I didn’t throw any chairs, clipboards, or hissy fits. I knew that we were playing a great team. And I saw them do the same thing they did to us to their previous 2 opponents. I realized that sometimes you can have a good plan, feel prepared, and still get beat.

But something interesting happened on my drive home from the game.

In the car, Magnus shared with me and my wife Dawn that the football players on his team sit together at lunch at school. I asked who sat together. He replied, ‘Everybody.’

He continued. ‘It’s really fun. We sit at a table that is supposed to sit like 6 people. But we crowd everybody in. There are probably 15 guys who all pack together at lunch.’

Stunned, I asked Magnus who specifically sat together. He again, said, ‘Everybody.’ Then he listed them by name. And sure enough, he included everyone on his team that attends Steffen Middle School in Mequon. (There are other kids on his team at 2 other schools in town.)

The kids he listed included the stars of the team and kids who are just happy to participate. It included kids who were born and raised in Mequon and new kids who just moved in from other towns and states. All of these 6th graders are in their first month of middle school. Which can be a challenging and lonely time.

As I drove the last couple of miles home after our loss I couldn’t help but think that while we lost the game that day, our team was winning at life. That the team culture we were creating at practice and through the broader Mequon-Thiensville Cardinal football program, and indeed the Homestead High School program, was translating to a winning team culture at school and in our community. The boys have developed strong bonds of friendship and a team identity. And just as importantly, they have someone to sit, talk and laugh with at lunch.

Key Takeaway

Not all of your wins show up on the scoreboard. Focus on developing a team culture where everyone feels included, and everyone feels important. Focus on the goals of unity, support, and continuous improvement. If you do, the wins will surely come. Often in unexpected ways.

*If you know someone who could benefit from this message, please share it with them.

+For more of the best life lessons I have learned check out my new book, What Does Your Fortune Cookie Say? from Ripples Media. For more ideas on team culture, look for my next book, The Culture Turnaround that I co-authored with Jeff Hilimire. The book is scheduled for publication in November.

How to feel like a winner even when your basketball team loses.

March is a thrilling month for sports fans. The NCAA basketball tournaments for both men and women provide an exciting distraction from the weather that never seems to be as warm and Marchy as the March in my head.

The basketball tournaments, affectionately known as March Madness, are fun to watch. Until they aren’t. What we fail to remember each year when the brackets are announced is that of the 64-ish teams in the tournament, all but one of them will end their season with a loss. That’s bad news, bears.

I pull for 3 teams that made the tournament: my home state University of Vermont Catamounts, my current hometown’s Maquette Golden Eagles, and my alma mater, the University of Wisconsin Badgers.

All 3 teams lost this weekend.

UVM and Marquette lost in the opening round. The 3-seed Badgers got bounced by the 11-seed Iowa State Cyclones after our starting point guard went down with a brankle late in the first half. (I don’t know what the official diagnosis was, but it looked like something broke in his ankle.)

Yes, I was disappointed by the losses. But I have noticed something very interesting in my adulthood. Unlike the lingering, long-lasting disappointment of my younger years, my disappointment today is very short-lived. By this, I mean that I bounce from a loss very quickly. In fact, I would say that I consistently move past my team’s losses within about 10 seconds. Which means a major loss now feels more like a mosquito bite than a bee sting or a Pamplona-style bull goring.

The Secret.

I know that the reason I bounce back from disappointment quickly now is that I feel like I am winning on my own scorecard. I engage in many personal and professional challenges and competitions. My progress, wins and successes in those arenas help minimize the negative impact I experience when my teams lose.

Here’s a list of some of my current challenges and competitions:

  1. I own a business. As an entrepreneur and owner of the advertising and idea agency The Weaponry, every day is an exciting challenge to win and get better than the day before.

2. I have written a book. In December I published my first book titled What Does Your Fortune Cookie Say? It features 80 of the most important life lessons I have learned, packaged as simple, memorable fortune cookie fortunes. Promoting the book and related speaking events are fun ongoing challenges. (I currently have 8 speaking events in the works and would be thrilled to do more.)

3. I am coaching high school track and field. The improvement of my shot putters and discus throwers at Homestead High School in Mequon, Wisconsin is a major outlet for my competitiveness. I am challenged to get better as a coach every day. I am constantly trying to improve my processes, systems and coaching techniques. And I have found that I have way more influence over the outcomes of my track athletes’ performances than I do with the college basketball teams I support.

4. I coach youth football. The growth and development of our now 5th-grade boys are way more important to me than the wins and losses of a college basketball team. Which means I can enjoy a Marquette win, but I quickly shrug off a loss. (I am talking about Marquette basketball. Their football team can’t buy a win.)

5. I work out. My personal exercise routine and its impact on my health, strength and fitness is an infinite game that I play every day. I get quick feedback and great returns on my investments in my health.

6. More books. I have more books in the works. Writing a book is a major challenge. So when you make regular progress on major challenges like this it is hard to get thrown off by an external event like a basketball loss.

7. Appalachian Trail. My wife Dawn and I are planning to hike the entire Appalachian Trail in a decade. It is good to have future challenges planned. It gives you something to look forward to. The planning and preparing for this type of challenge makes you feel like you have an ever-expanding life.

Key Takeaway

The best cure for sports fan sadness is to have wins in your personal life. Make sure you are still competing and winning. Set goals and challenges for yourself both personally and professionally. Create your own scorecard. Play your own games and win. Start a business, side hustle or volunteer organization. Exercise. Enter competitions. Write a book. Enter a race or any other challenge that makes you feel like you are pushing yourself to do more. These will keep you focussed on your own wins. Which minimizes the impact, duration and magnitude of external losses.

*If you know someone who could benefit from this message, please share it with them.

+If you’re interested in other messages on how to live a happier, more positive life, check out my book What Does Your Fortune Cookie Say? from Ripples Media. Heck, reading the reviews alone sounds like a win to me.

Never stop competing.

When you were young you competed all the time. You competed in the classroom and on the playground. You competed in the sports you played, or for the part in the play.

You competed for the best position in the band, orchestra or choir. Or you competed in chess, robotics, or forensics. Perhaps you competed for student council votes, in milk-tasting, in dance-offs, and with your Uncle Rico.

Then you competed for the attention of the boys or girls you were attracted to. You dressed nicely, took care of yourself physically, hygienically and follicly. You were thoughtful, kind, and you smelled good.

You competed to get into the good school or program. Then for the great job, the promotion, the raise. You competed to attract the great customer, client, project, or assignment. And you cared about the obscure awards that only your industry cares about. Like Outstanding Use of Whiteout in The Annual Low-Tech Secretary Awards.

Today, ask yourself Am I still competing?

Am I competing with my personal best? Am I still trying to learn, grow and improve? Or am I slowly coasting to a stop like a car that has run out of gas? Or like a skateboard that has run out of skateboarder?

Am I competing at work? Am I pushing to win for my customers and my teammates? Am I still trying to add more value? Are my biggest contributions still ahead of me. Or am I still milking my success from the 1900s?

Am I competing for my spouse or significant other? Am I taking care of myself? Am I treating my snuggle bunny in a way that makes me hard to beat? Am I still being thoughtful? And romantic? Do I buy flowers on non-holidays and when I don’t have to apologize for something I did, said, forgot, or broke?

Am I competing against time? Am I trying to do as much as I can within the limited time I have on this planet? Or at least during my pre-embalming fluid-filled time on the planet? (I have no idea how to properly hyphenate that last statement. If you are still competing in hyphenation let me know).

Key Takeaway

Never stop competing. Keep growing and improving. Keep pushing yourself and finding new ways to contribute. Keep competing for your spouse or significant other as if they have lots of other great options. Because they always do. Re-earn your role and your respect from others every day. Compete to make the most of every day. It is the best way to live your best life.

*If you know someone who could benefit from this message, please share it with them.