Tag: Growth

The award I have been obsessed with since high school.

When I was in high school I participated in track and field each spring. It was the perfect sport for someone like me who lives at the Venn diagram intersection of interested-in-self-improvement and terrible-at-baseball.

Track & field is simple to understand. It provides clear and immediate feedback on both your performance and your improvement. If your times go down, or your distances go up, you improved. If your measures go backward, you are going backward. As Jerry Reed sang, ‘When you’re hot you’re hot. When you’re not you’re not.’ Nothing is subjective.

However, at the end of each season, there was one subjective element: The Awards Banquet.

At Hanover High School in Hanover, New Hampshire, there were 4 awards handed out at the Track & Field Team banquet.

1. Freshman Of The Year.

2. Most improved.

3. MVP

4 The Samuelson Award for Oustanding Athlete (The award was named after the Samuelson family that Olympic gold medal marathoner Joan Benoit Samuelson married into. Her husband Scott has now held our high school’s pole vault record for 47 years.)

During my 4-year high school track and field career, I won 3 out of 4 of our school’s awards. But there was only one of them that I really wanted.

Freshman Year

I was totally forgettable my first year. While I scored enough points at meets that season to earn a varsity letter I wasn’t turning any heads. My good friend Ben Soderholm was the Freshman Of The Year. No contest. Ben was special right out of the blocks. Looking back now I figure that God knew that his life would be a sprint and he better get started fast to get as much in as he could during his relatively short life. (I miss you bro. Also, I realize that you probably don’t read my blog posts anymore. Or do you…)

Sophomore Year

My sophomore year I improved 30 feet in the discus and 7 feet in the shot put. I placed well in our conference meet and in the state championship meet in the discus. At the banquet, I was named the Most Improved Athlete.

Junior Year

My junior year I improved another 31 feet in the discus, and another 6 feet in the shot put. I was the state champion, New England Champion, and broke our school record in the discus. I also ran some hurdles, sprints and high jumped too. None of those performances would have won me any awards other than Most Willing To Be Vulnerable. At the banquet, I was named the team MVP.

Senior Year

My senior year I won a state championship, repeated as the New England champion, and set a state record that would stand for 12 years. At the banquet, I won the Samuelson Award as the Outstanding Athlete (male or female).

Me and my Mom and Dad after my last high school track meet in East Hartford, CT where I defended my New England title in the discus and broke the state record.

While I was certainly honored to win the Samuelson Award, I was envious of my teammate who won Most Improved. I was obsessed with that award. It was my personal quirk. But that quirk served me well. And the obsession with the MIA award is what won me the other 2 awards.

Reflection

I wanted to improve so much each year that I would be the obvious and undisputed Most Improved Athlete each year, no matter how good I became. It was a healthy obsession. (Not a case of possession obsession.) I loved the work. I loved the sacrifice. I loved the process. And I loved the results like Joan Jett loves rock n’ roll.

Looking back several decades later, I also loved what the process of improvement in track and field taught me about improvement in the rest of my life. The desire to greet each day a little better than the day before is core to my mission and my self-image.

Today, I am focused on self-improvement in various roles including:

  • Husband
  • Father
  • Friend
  • Entrepreneur
  • Marketer
  • Investor
  • Coach
  • Author
  • Speaker
  • Person who has a body. (I am focused on improving my fitness. But this construct made it awkward to state that. Sorry.)
  • List maker

Today, much of my self-improvement comes from reading, studying, and reflecting on what works and what doesn’t. It comes through listening to the wisdom of others. And through trial and error. It is a product of accumulating knowledge. As a result, I get better at things slowly, but steadily.

The most encouraging part of my journey is that I can feel the improvement. Just as I could tell that I was improving as an athlete thanks to the tape measure, I can tell that I am better at the 10 roles listed above. And as I get better at these, other people inquire about my approach to each of these roles. I have found that the simplest measure of your improvement in any area is whether or not people are asking you for insights and advice on that topic.

Key Takeaway

Life is one long self-improvement journey. Take what you learned about self-improvement through athletics, music, dance, acting, scouts, or any other childhood activity and apply it to your adult roles. Get a little bit better every day. The compounding effect of your improvements will change your life in ways that you can’t even imagine.

*If you know someone who could benefit from this message, please share it with them.

+For more of the best life lessons I have learned check out my book, What Does Your Fortune Cookie Say? from Ripples Media.

Is this your thing or is it leading you to your thing?

I want you to stop for a moment and think.

Think about where you are in life right now.

Think about your work, your school, or your primary non-cinnamon role.

Ask yourself:

  • ‘Is this the thing I am destined to do?’
  • ‘Is this what I have been working towards?’
  • ‘Have I arrived?’
  • ‘Or is this simply leading me to where I am going?’

It is easy to think that where you are right now is your story, role, or great achievement.

But if you are growing, there is always more. Like the sizes at a Big and Tall clothing store.

There are new chapters. New challenges. New knowledge. New capabilities. And new identities. And if you are Mork from Ork, there is Nanu Nanu.

I have been surprised by how many doors I have passed through at the back of wardrobes. But instead of finding lions, and witches, I keep finding new opportunities and perspectives.

These doors have led me to great new experiences that I didn’t realize were coming. But now I expect more incredible things ahead. Which is probably how Dave Grohl feels.

It is a beautiful place to be in your life, career, or avocation when you expect more and better roles in your future because growth and transformation have become the rule, not the exception.

Key Takeaway

Keep going. Keep Growing. There is more and better ahead.

*If you know someone who could benefit from this message, please share it with them.

+For more of the best life lessons I have learned check out my book, What Does Your Fortune Cookie Say? from Ripples Media.

Why the greatest success stories are created by the hour.

Every January we think about the year ahead. We set goals and resolutions and dream about how we are going to be different in 365 days. It’s a beautiful idea. But it doesn’t really work. Because while there is no shortage of goals, dreams or plans, results are harder to find than a squeezable pack of Charmin in 2020.

A major part of the problem is that a year is just too long. It gives you too much time to slack off. Think about the hare from the law firm of Tortoise & Hare. That bunny had too, too, too much time on his hands. In a one-minute race, the rabbit would have dominated. It was the perception that he had plenty of time for a comeback that ruined him.

The Solve

The best way to crush your goals like red pepper is to stop measuring your progress in years. Instead, focus on having great hours.

Start each day with your success list. Then block your activities on your calendar. Those time blocks are your building blocks for success. By stacking several great hours together daily, and doing that day after day, you will build great weeks, months, and years.

It all starts with the hour you are in right now. (Like Van Halen said.) Focus on making this hour great. Then, think about grading your hours every day. If you do what you intended to do with an hour, give it an excellent grade. If you didn’t do the work, workout, reading, rest, socializing, or play that you intended to do, that hour gets a poor grade.

The feedback is immediate. And motivating. Experiencing a bad hour will inspire you to respond with a much better next hour. Which means your comeback is always less than 60 minutes away. (Although L.L. Cool J won’t call it a comeback.)

There are 168 hours in every week. Which translates to a lot of opportunities for progress and happiness. Make them count. And you will turn your entire life into a success story.

Key Takeaway

Shorten your measurable units of success. The power in a great hour is instantly recognizable and controllable. An hour well spent provides a great return on your investment. Which has a compounding effect. Remember, great hours are the building blocks of a great life. And you will start to see the results in just 60 minutes.

*If you know someone who could benefit from this message, please share it with them.

+For more of the best life lessons I have learned check out my book, What Does Your Fortune Cookie Say? from Ripples Media.

How to tap into the amazing superpower you were born with.

When I was a kid I loved watching Saturday morning cartoons. Especially cartoons about superheroes. One of the defining characteristics of a superhero is their signature superpower. Like super strength, super stretchiness, super spideriness or super soup-making abilities.

But all humans have an innate superpower that enables them to transform into an amazingly powerful human. That superpower is your ability to evolve.

This is not the type of evolution that a species experiences over a series of generations. Like when humans lost their tails. Or the way texting is going to evolve us into a species with super pointy thumbs.

This type of super evolution is available to every human during their own lifetime. Which means that you have the ability to dramatically transform yourself. No phone booth or super suit required.

You can transform yourself physically, through exercise and significantly increase your strength, endurance, flexibility and pain tolerance.

You can transform your thinking through self-education, reading, classes, accumulated experience and knowledge.

You can transform yourself mentally, by developing your resilience, grit, and determination.

You can transform your income by learning how to provide ever-increasing value to others.

You can evolve into a more compassionate human by recognizing the evolutionary journey others are on.

You can develop tremendous courage, kindness, and creativity. As well as other positive attributes that don’t start with a C or K.

As a human, you can develop great strengths in any area of your life. Your potential is unlimited. So think like a superhero. Because you have the ability to evolve into the most amazing human you can imagine.

Key Takeaway

Your ability to evolve is your great superpower. Push yourself to grow and improve every day. Recognize that strain, pain and adversity trigger your growth. Embrace challenges that force you to adapt. They are gifts that continuously generate a better, stronger, smarter version of yourself.

*If you know someone who could benefit from this message, please share it with them.

+For more of the best life lessons I have learned check out my new book, What Does Your Fortune Cookie Say? from Ripples Media.

Spend quality time with people who know things you don’t.

From the moment you were born you were programmed to grow stronger and smarter every day. Which is why you don’t come out of the womb with a driver’s license and a scalpel.

One of the most important ways you become a stronger, more capable machine is by simply interacting with other people. In fact, you learn more from other humans than from any other source. Even if you have a killer set of encyclopedias.

When you engage with humans they add:

  • Knowledge
  • Skills
  • Insights
  • Perspective
  • Confidence
  • Connections
  • Resources
  • Joy
  • Entertainment
  • Ideas
  • Tools
  • Support
  • Kindness
  • Happiness
  • Inspiration
  • Motivation
  • Charcuterie (Definitely spend more time with anyone who offers a solid spread.)

Key Takeaway

Seek out human interaction. When you spend time with people who are ahead of you on your development journey they naturally pull you forward. Make sure to share with others too. You have gifts and knowledge that offer great value to those around you. And everyone improves in the process.

*If you know someone who could benefit from this message, please share it with them.

+For more of the best life lessons I have learned check out my new book, What Does Your Fortune Cookie Say? from Ripples Media.

What great lessons would you learn if you met the ideal you?

Life is a choose-your-own-adventure game. Every moment of every day, you get to decide what you do next. You choose action vs non-action. You choose the type of action. You choose where you are. And who you are with. You even choose which way to put the toilet paper roll on the holder. Which determines whether or not you are a heathen.

Imagine that with every choice, you are splitting into multiple versions of yourself. There is a version of you that said yes and no, who did and did not with every choice you ever had the opportunity to make.

Every one of the possible choices led to a different possible you.

Now imagine that once you reach the afterlife, you are all there. All of the iterations of you spawned by different decisions converge at You-a-palooza. Even Death Row you would be there, fresh from the electric chair. You would recognize them by their hair. And the spark in their eyes.

Super You

You would meet the version of you that accomplished the most and made the most good decisions. You would meet the you who took the most actions, who put themself in the right place at the right time, and spent time with the best people.

Think about how that person compares to the you that you are today.

Would you be very alike, or very different?

What could you learn from them?

This is a semi-creepy photo that semi-represents the Multi-You Concept.

Now, consider what you can do to get closer to that version of yourself, starting today.

Would you:

  • Take new actions?
  • Make different decisions?
  • Update your goals and decision-making criteria?
  • Move?
  • Change jobs or careers?
  • Start that personal project?
  • Volunteer and give?
  • Create a business?
  • Take a leap?
  • Not be afraid?
  • Exercise?
  • Hang out with different people?
  • Stop a bad habit?
  • Pick up new hobbies?
  • Study?
  • Read?
  • Ask questions?
  • Put the donut down?

Key Takeaway

There is a best version of you. You have the opportunity to get closer to that person every day. Consider what they are like, who they are and what they do that makes them so great. Compare yourself to Super You. Let them guide you. And close the gap between the two of you every day.

*If you know someone who could benefit from this message, please share it with them.

+For more of the best life lessons I have learned check out my new book, What Does Your Fortune Cookie Say? from Ripples Media.

The important life lesson we can all learn from rivers.

Last week I crossed over 2 rivers I have crossed a thousand times before.

But this time the rivers were different.

Completely different. (Like Stand By Me River and Sidewalk in Front of The Viper Room River.)

I was farther north than I had ever seen the rivers before.

If it weren’t for the signs on the bridges that told me what rivers I was crossing I would have never recognized them.

They were much smaller bodies of water than they are farther downstream.

They were more like creeks.

And if you only knew the creekish version of the rivers you would be shocked to learn what they transformed into 50, 100, or 200 miles south.

I took the fact that this happened with two different rivers as a universal reminder that this is what happens with all rivers. (Even Joan and Philip.)

It was also a reminder that those rivers are like you and me.

We all start small.

But we are designed to grow, strengthen, accumulate and expand as we go.

We get smarter and more capable. We grow in our knowledge and experience. We expand our skills and capabilities.

As a result, our influence, access, and impact grows.

Our potential, momentum, and power increase.

It’s a wonder to witness in someone else.

It’s an amazing feeling inside yourself.

But you have to reflect to recognize it.

Just like visiting the river upstream.

Key Takeaway

Keep going. Keep flowing. Keep growing. Just like the river does. You’ll become more impressive, more impactful and more useful to others as you travel your journey.

*If you know someone who could benefit from this message, please share it with them.

+For more of the best life lessons I have learned check out my new book, What Does Your Fortune Cookie Say? from Ripples Media.

Why I love my gaps and you should too.

I’m willing to bet that you are not as great as you want to be. If you are, you can stop reading here.

(I see you are still reading. Which means that either I was right, or the brakes on your eyeballs don’t work.)

You may not be as fit, rich, successful, kind, patient or brave as you wish you were.

In fact, you probably fall short of your ideal on a lengthy list of skills, states, and attributes.

That’s a gift.

The gap between where you are now and your ideal provides the motivation to act. It provides the motivation to improve. It creates the silent force that propels you. It fuels your hunger, drive, and growth.

And ultimately, your gap helps close your gap.*

*If The Gap at your local mall has recently closed it’s not your fault. Unless you were the manager.

How to know where you are on your improvement journey.

Anytime you try something new you will be bad at it. Or at least relatively bad at it. And I don’t mean like Michael Jackson or George Thorogood.

But when you are trying to develop your skills and abilities there is a useful way to think about your improvement journey.

Simply focus on increasing the percentage of times you get it right.

At first, you may get a specific technique or execution right 1 in 1000 or 1 in 100 tries.

This means that you’ve moved your percentage from 0% to 0.1%, or from 0% to 1%.

That’s amazing progress.

In fact, it is the most important progress of all.

Then just keep going.

At 2% you are 100% better than you were at 1%. Or at least that was true according to old math.

Now, focus your efforts to increase your success rate from 1 in 100 to 1 in 10. 

Then advance to 5 in 10.

Next push yourself to 9 out of 10. Like the dentists who recommend Crest toothpaste.

Then keep pushing yourself until you can nail 99 out of 100 attempts.

Key Takeaway

Self-improvement is a percentage game. You’ll likely never get every task right 100% of the time. But get as close as you can. Pay attention to your performance percentages. It is the easiest way to track your progress. Keep pushing yourself. The challenge is fun, rewarding, and most importantly, quantifiable.

*If you know someone who could benefit from this message, please share it with them.

+For more tips and techniques for your self-improvement journey check out my new book What Does Your Fortune Cookie Say? from Ripples Media.

Make the most of your magic ingredient.

Yeast is like magic. It is the secret, almost invisible ingredient that makes bread rise. It creates action and life. It creates transformation. And alcohol. And stank.

But yeast only works if the conditions are favorable. If the environment is too cold it won’t activate. If the temperature is too hot it kills the yeast that makes the magic. #TooHotInTheHotTub

The human spirit is like yeast. It is your magic ingredient. It is the will to win. The drive to succeed. The hunger for more.

The human spirit fuels your resilience and determination. It is the force that will transform you into something even more remarkable tomorrow. Something far more remarkable than bread. Or beer.

But just as yeast needs the proper conditions to activate, so does the human spirit.

Remember

If you are a business owner, leader, parent, teacher, coach, or the person who runs Fight Club, you are responsible for creating the environment.

Your most important job is to make sure the environment doesn’t kill the magic ingredient.

Great people won’t stay in a toxic work environment.

Great athletes won’t stay to play on a negative team.

A lion tamer won’t stick his head in the mouth of a stressed-out lion. (At least not more than once.)

And most importantly, a poor home environment will prevent children from growing into the amazing adults they were born to be. We can’t let this happen.

Key Takeaway

Create an environment that lets the human spirit work its magic. Or seek out a supportive environment for yourself. And magic will surely follow.

*If you know someone who could benefit from this message, please share it with them.

For more, check out my new book, What Does Your Fortune Cookie Say? from Ripples Media.